Doing Things Differently

I was bored (well, bored enough) the other day and started to day dream a little: What would I do differently with the next baby (whenever s/he decides to make his/her presence known to us) from what I did with this one? So, since I have a little time right now, I think I'll brainstorm a little.

For starters, I know one thing that I want to be different: Not another c-section! For those of you who don't know, my labor was being really boring initially, so they put me on Pitocin, followed (not immediately) by an epidural, followed by more Pitocin, followed by N being in Fetal Distress, followed by emergency c-section 17 hours after my water broke. I had to be put under because, even though I had that epidural (which I hated because it made me sick and the loss of feeling in my legs freaked me out--I think that's from my dancing history) I could still feel them cutting me, so they put me under, which I think now was a blessing, because I probably would've not done well not being able to hold my baby and then watch her being taken away while I got sewed up. I missed all of that and I'm glad for it. But I still hated the c-section. I hated the recovery. I hated how much breastfeeding hurt when my uterus was trying to shrink down after being surgically opened. Hated it all; and I hated it for a while afterwards. I think I was in denial early on (at least while a Postpartum Depression nurse calls you up to make sure you're okay) but then I had a hard time with it a few months after her birth. Now it's all good--I'm fine with it. Just, never again.

I've done plenty of research about a VBAC (Vaginal Birth After Cesarean) and I know my risks. I've also done plenty of research about a RCS (Repeart Cesarean Section) and I know my risks there as well. I'm educated in both situations and I choose VBAC. It's not for everyone, but a RCS is not for me. Now, don't worry, if there's a medical problem prior to birth where it is obviously better to do a RCS (i.e. Placenta Previa), I'll do it. I'm not going to risk our lives if I know it's not safe. Be that as it may, if I'm healthy and the pregnancy is healthy, I'm doing a VBAC, and that's that.

Okay, moving on. Next to change for #2 would be a midwife. My Ob/Gyn was not even present for N's birth because she wasn't on call (I've spoken to other moms who have her and we're not sure when she's ever on call...) so I had a new doctor who had a mind of his own. Never again. It's a midwife for me. It will be someone who will listen to me and what I want done and will look into alternative treatments besides drugs and will help me through it all. Now, it won't be just any midwife; it'll be one at the Tucson Birth & Women's Health Center, right next door to Tucson Medical Center, so if there should be an emergency, an OR is just a hop skip and a jump away.

Next, making the switch to cloth diapers. I've had it with these disposables. Sure, they're convenient, but they're also super expensive, full of gross chemicals, sit in landfills for ever and always, and come with gross and smelly diaper pails (we have a Diaper Genie II Elite which certainly is not the greatest invention, for sure). Sure, I know that cloth diapers also come with gross and smelly diaper pails, but I also know that there's an enzyme/bacteria eating spray that you spray on the diapers prior to inserting them in the pail to get rid of the smell. You can't do that with disposables. Plus the wool ones would be awesome since we have rash-prone skin in our home and a breathable cover just makes sense. Besides the smell (duh), and the fact that I'm sure one needs to change cloths more frequently than disposables, I see nothing wrong with these things. Heck, if my mom could do it, so can I. Ha!

Something else I would change is getting a better sleep pattern started earlier then I did with N. She slept in a Co-Sleeper Bassinet initially until 1) she got her nights and days straight, 2) I felt comfortable enough to get up and feed without hurting, and 3) we got a crib (yeah, we didn't get the crib until she was 4 months old but when someone buys you something really nice, like a crib you can't really afford, you work with their schedule). Now that we have a crib, kid #2 is going in there before 4 months old. N was nursed to sleep, which, IMHO, should've have been done away with around 2 or 3 months old because she relied on it by 4 months. So, whenever she woke up, she had to nurse to get back to sleep. Now, I don't mind night nursings at all, but somewhere deep down inside me I truly believe if a baby can be put to sleep on his/her own at 3 months-ish, I think the kid would sleep better than somebody (N still wakes up too many times a night at 14 months). Plus, after about 2 months of that, I shut down inside. My body just can't do it anymore. Especially having N with her "sleep patterns", I'd really be in a world of hurt with another one added in the mix.

I do believe those are my only things I'd want to change. They're major things, but I'd rather have 4 big things to change then 15 little things to change. I really have had (and still have!) a wonderful time raising N. She's such a sweet little girl. And I really don't think these changes have anything to do with her. It really have everything to do with me! Funny how that is.

If anyone with children actually reads my blog, I want to hear from you! Is there anything you will do with a second (or third, or fourth...) child (or if you're done having children, was there anything that you would've changed thinking about it now) that you haven't already tried?

PS: Pretty soon I'll update you with N's room and our home improvement whatnots. I promise!